The Voice of Truth

So.....how are we doing? A week ago, I would have cried and told you we are hanging in there....taking everything day by day. Today, I can, with strength, tell you I am doing great.

Over the past week to week and a half, a lot has been going on, many words of encouragement have been spoken, cards have been sent, tears have been shed. I hid away in moments and then in others, filled my days so that thoughts wouldn't even have to enter my mind. I have prayed into my feelings and my sorrow. I have come out stronger!

Last Friday, I woke up, looked at the pictures of my son and smiled. What a beautiful little boy he was if only in my eyes and he now makes me smile! You see....I have my very own Angel, looking down on me and I realized I can't let him down! I have to show him how strong his Mommy is and loving and how much I loved him and still do.

Unfortunately, a very sad event had to bring me to this realization. I have had so many people calling me and sharing with me their words of encouragement. In one call, I was shocked by things said. I might have taken this the wrong way because of my emotions...but that is that. I was told that God would not do this to a baby. That Satan played a role in my little Oliver's passing. That in the past, this person has been angry with God because of death and wanted answers and only in answers could she find peace. That was her choice.

This conversation made me realize I had a choice. I choose to smile. I choose to believe that My God is good and loving and knows what is best for me. I choose to believe that He numbers our days...He knows His plan for each of us and He knew Oliver's, too. I choose to believe that the devil played no role in my son's life. I won't give him that satisfaction! I choose to see the beauty in my son, not the sorrow. I choose to see the lives Oliver has touched in the short time he was here. I choose to remember him kicking after I ate Banana Cream Pie and his beautiful heart beat that I got to listen to for 8 wonderful weeks. I choose to believe that I don't need an answer because when I get it....I will be holding my son in heaven and then it won't matter. I make this choice now every morning.

We all, you and I, are God's 1st! We are all His children before we were our parents and we are still His before we are wives or sisters or friends. We are God's! And when He calls us home...there is nothing that can stop it.

You won't believe this....but I found so much comfort in a familiar song. I know, crazy!

Oh,what I would do to have
the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win,
You you'll never win

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

But the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
The Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
And the Voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the Voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the Voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are the Voice of truth

Our God is good!